8:22 AM – A Whatsapp message pops up on one of the groups. It is an article about the time zones of life. I am sure you all must have read it too. The first thing that came to my already messed up mind was ‘how situational!’
4:23 PM – In the middle of an almost ridiculous conversation the question “What do you think about time zones?” was slipped. Had she read my Whatsapp messages? Or was this a universal concept? You don’t think of concepts like these when everything is hunky-dory. You never reflect upon life when you’re happy – because you are too busy basking in it’s glory. It is when your yard work has not been done properly do you worry about the value proposition of your grass.
I did not know how to answer that question. Time zones – okay – yes – maybe – just a way of saying focus on improving your gardening skills and appreciate the blades of your grass rather than envying someone else’s. Makes sense. And that is probably a constructive sentiment and emotion to have. Two people from different walks of life had spoken about the same concept in a day. Time to think. My clouded mind (and I did not even have to consume an adult beverage for my mind to be in that state) started gathering the scattered thoughts on the bus ride back home.
I am a woman of science. Yes – vampires, witches, psychics, philosophy intrigue me. But… show me some proof if you want me on board. Yes, I like the concept of the green grass and time zones –
The grass is greener when you water it.
The grass is greener on the other side because well.. it is fake.
My favorite – I am too busy smoking my grass to notice that yours is greener.
But the bottom line is – I am too busy working on my own grass to notice yours is greener.
They say patience is the key (lol). They say things happen when they have to. They (loosely) use the term “meant to be” at equal intervals. But i still don’t get it. Perhaps these are multiple concepts intertwined into one and so it shall take some time for me to grasp. Meanwhile let’s decide to do the following –
seek help to improve gardening skills
water your grass every day
know that watering the grass every day may not translate into a greener grass instantly. It is not Maggie noodles.
talk to people in the same boat
appreciate the blades of your grass
respect the present by living in it
be grateful that you even have a yard and keep yourself too busy to notice anyone else’s
Disclaimer: This post was created in my brain while waiting to get my nostril re-pierced.
Day of event: 04/12/2019, Friday
Weeks fly by. Earning calls come quick. Weekends arrive before I am ready. Cannot comprehend life at this pace. On a different note, my new nose jewelry was not the right size and kept on falling off. As a result all patience was lost and I removed the jewelry once and for all. Soon my piercing died off.
5:15 PM – I step out of the tarot card reader’s establishment feeling conned (no offence meant for tarot card science. The psychic can feel free to be offended though). I always thought that psychics were not meant to talk negative about their clients. This one did. She was brutal. I was too broken to even fight back (not that I would have anyway). It shall be a while before that gets funny.
5:30 PM – The wait at Deep Roots Piercing & Tattoo was real – 45 minutes. I was at UW and decided to enjoy whatever was left of the Cherry Blossoms and do my favorite thing for healing purposes – get coffee. The Psychic’s words rushed through my mind. Coffee needed desperately.
I figured Orin’s place at the Paccar would be a good place to get coffee. I took the road I traversed while I worked as a Student Assistant at Foster’s. Some things never change – the way to Paccar was still as beautiful.
I worked as a Research Assistant for PhD students at the Foster School of Business during my 1st year of the Master’s degree. It was hard work! Taking care of all of the research studies and the undergrad kids was very interesting. And it was great! One fine day, one of the PhD students took me out for coffee at Orin’s. That was probably my first interaction with Starbucks. I had no clue what to order and the prices looked a lot more than I could afford at that time. So, I went for cheapest – brewed coffee. She saw me struggle with creme and sugar and said, “Boy, you don’t do this often, do you?”
She was right. I’d never bought coffee before then. Never needed to. I lived 2 blocks away from the campus and ran home for everything.
Sadly, Orin’s was closed today so I decided to buy coffee from Suzzallo.
5:50 PM – The Quad.
Call me superstitious but the people I visit the quad to see cherry blossoms or the Skagit Tulip festival with walk out of my life sooner or later. So, I make a conscious choice of not blossoming in cherries and tulips with the people I love.
I walked to Suzzallo to grab coffee from the moderately new and shiny Starbucks they have. If you haven’t checked out the new store yet, you should. I ordered the usual – Caramel Macchiato and paid retail since it is a Licensed store (hence, no employee discounts). Man, it hurts to pay retail! Coffee @ Starbucks IS expensive!
5:52 PM – While I waited for my drink and chilled on the very comfortable and mostly supremely expensive leather couch I was reminded of Thursdays.
During the second year of my Master’s, Thursdays used to be straight 16 hour days. I used to pick a 8-9 hour shift at the UW Athletics during the day and attend the lecture in the evenings. On my way from UW Athletics to Mary Gates I used to pick up Starbucks Coffee from the HUB. It was a routine I loved. Also, my second interaction with Starbucks.
My entire family flew in to see me graduate. I felt blessed. Sending over gifts is a tradition I love. I sent back gifts from the 1st Starbucks in Seattle. In case you didn’t know, the 1st Starbucks store carries exclusive merchandise that is not sold elsewhere in the world.
A week later, I received an offer from Starbucks.
An offer from Starbucks took me back to connecting the pieces of my life – piecing the puzzle if you will. My first interaction with Starbucks was an introduction to Starbucks in all sorts of ways. The second interaction taught me how priceless it was – Starbucks coffee on Thursdays was the most needed and valuable coffee of the week! My third interaction with Starbucks instilled a sense of pride in me. My most recent interaction with Starbucks made me realize that one can still have a borderline impostor syndrome after almost three years of working with the company.
The point is, I never thought that incidences in life are actually connected; that the experiences you have actually mean something. There IS a bigger picture and every experience, good or bad, helps build that bigger picture. You never know what the experiences you have shall lead to. I have experienced Starbucks in different capacities in the past few years – each one more rewarding than the previous one.
This passing thought gives me hope. Maybe the recent turn of events mean something; the creation of a bigger picture that I can’t see because I am not tall enough. Time to be grateful; time to be hopeful; time to have some faith. More to come.
Also, look how famous working at Starbucks can make one!
2:30 PM – What can go wrong with Wine and Chocolate?
4:30 PM – All roads lead to the winery.
Time Unknown – Back home.
A little after Time Unknown – Bed time.
12:48 AM – *Wakes up super thirsty* *Finishes an entire bottle of water* Sleeping with alcohol in the system – Bad Life Choice.
1:30 AM – Still wide awake. It has been a while since I have reflected upon my life and laid awake thinking in circles. I felt happy knowing that I do not do that anymore. Finally, adulthood brings wisdom.
Happy Realization: Life = hourglass. Time = sand. Nothing can be done about it. There is no way you can stop anything. Love, relationships, work, betrayals, infidelity, successes, failures, uncertainty, disappointment… the past few years have been very formative. Time has flown by. A series of events rushed through my mind like the Virar fast local – too fast to be categorized in buckets. I looked at my phone. Drunk texts.
2:20 AM – I decide to do something with my life.
2:22 AM – I start cooking. Cooking was obviously a better use of time than reminiscing my past. I immediately texted my dinner gang about hosting dinner the next day.
2:40 AM to 2:49 AM – “If it is not happy… it is not the end.” is what I believe. But is this really it? Is this all there is to life? Shouldn’t all ends be happy? Do disappointments end ever? Do fairy tales really come true? Does Prince Charming exist in real life? Is everyone entitled to a miracle or does it only happen to a selected few? And the average people have to struggle for everything? I have officially run out of patience on all matters related to heart and brain. Patience needs Patience. Faith needs Faith. Hope needs Hope. But I’m no Quitter.
I am a fan of SATC, mostly because I wish to be like Carrie. I was reminded of the first SATC movie in which Big left Carrie at the altar after a courtship of a decade. She stayed with Charlotte for a while post the incidence because she had nowhere to go. There is this scene when Carrie reads a book to Charlotte’s daughter, Lily, at bed time. In the middle of the scene Lily asks her to read the bed timefairy tale once more to which Carrie responds “Sweetie, you know this is not true, right?” I could totally see myself replacing Carrie in that scene.
Carrie and Big do get married eventually.
3:03 AM – The train of thought halted at the ‘positive affirmation’ station. From SATC to philosophy! I know! Brain is weirdly wired. NVM. Apparently, you can make things happen by the power of positive affirmation. The secret?! A few of my friends swear on it. I wonder if that works. Maybe it does.
3:13 AM – I googled how to positively affirm. Turns out it’s not that easy. Also, can sound really silly at times. I freaked out when I read the first few. But turns out they work!
Life is complicated. The balancing act of (moderately) succeeding at work, searching for love (while googling ‘am i really in love with him?’), trying to get into a relationship (need to google this one + does not mean commitment), managing finances (poorly) and doing all this while maintaining sanity is a tough one. Who knew we had signed up for so much when we entered adulthood. I can’t remember why I wanted to grow up really. It only makes sense on ‘Pay Day’. In the midst of this slightly negative self-talk I still find myself fixated on one thing – If it’s not Happy, I refuse to treat it as the End.