ofsunandsand

#lessonsOfLife #happyRealization 2018

I’ve had an opportunity of listing the things I’ve learnt these past few years. However, I have had a tough time jogging down the memory lane for the past year. I do remember a few things I realized this year though. Please find below a list of things I realized –

I can be a part of a show – Life has been happening ever since I have become a part of Live2DanceSeattle productions. This year we stepped it up a notch and had a show of our own – Desi Detour. It was a beautiful and sweaty journey that ended with a rad evening. It was definitely a proud moment.
Cleanliness maybe next to Godliness – Desi Detour was tough. Juggling work and the dance schedule was impossible. There used to be ‘wait list’ for dishes to go into the sink (because the sink was already full with soiled dishes). But nothing bothered me. Soiled dishes and messy apartment failed to steal my sleep. Me so much chill.
I love my bed – I think it is the only thing that cares about my comfort and sleep.
I love my couch – As do my friends. My couch recognizes my needs. It swallows me when I am exhausted. It’s big enough to accommodate all my friends (all 4 of them). Also, it does not complain when it is messy.
Money is tough – Earning, investing, saving, spending… everything about money is tough.
Travel is wisdom – In hindsight, I have learnt a lot from my #travelDiaries. The rich experiences have made me wiser, more organized, and given me excellent stories to tell!
Try to be a minimalist – One fine day I realized that I was a pretty small for all this baggage in life. So, I got up and donated 2 bags worth of clothes to Good Will and threw away 3 trash bags worth of unwanted items. I couldn’t believe I had so much to let go.
Let go and Move on – My ‘let go and move on‘ game is at it’s strongest right now. It’s amazing how people walking in and out of my life has ceased to matter to me. It’s sad really. But Oh well!
Mental health – I’ve realized the importance of mental health. As Indians we don’t really learn about mental health awareness at school. Mental problems are considered to be first world since real world problems are aplenty. Any discussion about mental health or even consulting a psychiatrist/psychologist is a taboo. However, I have realized that sometimes mental health is more important than physical health. Wrong attitude reflects poorly on you and shows at work and home. Definitely not a good place to be.
What’s your contingency plan? – Everything was hunky dory until we received an email from our CEO about impending layoffs. The world stood still. It forced me to think about my contingency plan – and there was none. My career was everything I have ever worked for and so this experience was a little scary. You start working with a company and you work for it till the end of time or till you decide to go for something better. It is always your choice. You never think about getting laid off. That thought had never crossed my mind until that one email. I obviously did not receive it well. The experience did teach me to make contingency plans and plan better. You know what else I realized? – Nothing is permanent.
Never take anything for granted – In this day, age, country, visa status take nothing, nothing for granted at all. It’s surreal how situations change every minute. That makes me wonder whether or not we should even have loyalty towards a city, state, organization or people. Life is beautiful and you’re living your dream. Shoot me if I take my life for granted.

Hope you remember your 2018 better than I do. And Happy New Year!

Something to hold on to…

As Instagram suggests, I have been dancing (sort of) for the past 2 years now. I don’t know what this suggests to you. To some it may seem that I have nothing else to do in life. To me it is something to hold on to. It’s something that keeps me sane and going. The funny thing is – I did not even know that. I was asked if i were joining both the sessions and I responded –

“Yea, I need something to hold on to”, I said.

I studied Engineering. I always wanted to graduate from a reputed school and I did. I have an amazing job that I had never even dreamed of, beautiful set of friends, homey apartment, supportive family, extremely comfortable couch, entertaining TV and 1 and a 1/2 first-world problems and I still need something to hold on to? I was left wondering if this was a first world problem as well. Is nurturing your soul a cosmetic problem? Is wanting to do more than work unnecessary?

Maybe not. Work is not everything. Good grades don’t guarantee you a good life. Mental health is important too. You need something to forget the world momentarily, multiply your happiness, change your mood, be passionate about, look forward to after you’re done working for your dividends; something to hold onto. This ‘something’ is necessary for peace of mind. I realized this more as I grew older.

And by all means, this ‘something’ can change. Be it dancing, meditation, yoga, exercise,reading, writing, running …whatever floats your boat. Do it. We all need that something to hold onto…

#wontEatWillTravel Crystal Mountain, WA

08/18/2018: Day trip to Crystal Mountain.

Crystal mountain, Pierce County, is a ski area. Nevertheless, it is a good place for a short day-trip during summers as well. It is a beautiful 2-hour drive from Seattle. The view is ecstatic.

The view!!

The most amazing time-lapse I’ve ever captured. I swear my head spun after watching this the first time.

Someone was actually getting married there. I thought it was brilliant!! Pretty #Sherpa I must say.

Plandids/Candids –

#lessonsOfLife

I grew a year older and wiser this month. Here’s a list of things I’ve learned in the last year –

I am fully capable of living on my own… in the heart of downtown… alone… \m/
One can sleep after watching a horror movie because… (see the next point)
Sleep is the most important thing ever.
Earplugs work just fine for the early morning trash trucks.
Some things are just not meant to work out.
People change.
People leave.
Some people leave for a reason. The reason stays even after they’ve left.
Work is life but life is not work – however you want to put it.
Mental illness is real.
Medical bills are huge. Be fit. Stay fit.
‘Me’ time is a real thing. You need ‘Me’ time.
French fries are an acceptable lunch option.
It is absolutely fine to fall asleep while at movies.
It is okay not to party on a Friday. You can be a homebody if you want to.
It is not okay to be indecisive. Decisions are important.
Let go and move on.
Forgive and forget. Don’t get back in touch though.
If you think you have “problems” in life may be read a newspaper or watch the news for 5 mins. Follow the theory of relativity. Your problems are the uber first world problems most people would die to have. There would be at least a million people on the face of this earth who would be more than happy to live your life.
Family is the real deal.
Travel makes you wiser. Travel as much as possible. #wontEatWillTravel
Milky way is beautiful. Try star-gazing as much as possible.
Netflix is chocolate cake and amazon prime video is the icing on it.
Live life with no regrets.
Past is in the past for a reason. Never turn back. You are not going there.
Some people do not understand the concept of ‘olive branch’ and it is not your responsibility to you to teach them.
Your mood should never be dependent on the people around you. Stay calm. Stay foolish.

#wontEatWillTravel New Orleans 2017

I have been a big fan of ‘The Originals’. #Netflix rocks. This trip to New Orleans was totally dedicated to The Originals. I secretly hoped to spot Niklaus somewhere. A few pictures from the attempt.

I had conveniently forgotten my phone charger. So I googled the nearest retailer to buy a new one. The street signs looked really pretty so I decided to click pictures on my way around New Orleans. Fortunately, my shoes matched the street signs.

‘The Originals’ has quite a few shots from the cemeteries. We decided to take a tour of St. Louise’s cemetery. Didn’t know cemeteries could be so crowded and cool.

‘The Bayou’ is where all werewolves reside according to the ‘The Originals’. So we decided to take a tour of the bayou. It was raining heavily and we were all wet by the time the tour started. The bayou was beautiful. Also, the alligators ate marshmallows. IKR! And…we got to hold them! It was a scary experience and took a couple takes to get a good shot.

Random things and places in New Orleans. This city does have a weird and wonderful vibe and the most delicious beignets!

A few selfies and pictures of all of us!

Date: August 2017

#wontEatWillTravel San Francisco

A few pictures from my first trip to the bay area. Many more to come –

Always wanted a picture of my reflection

A click from the front-seat of the car while waiting at the red light.

The beautiful ceiling of palace of fine arts …

How i wish i was smart enough to study here!

Selfie with my fav people – The Kulkarnis

Date: January 2017

Of Choices and More…

8:00 AM: I left for Trader Joe’s to buy cucumber as instructed. Fire sounded very serious about picnic plans and I wanted to prove my support. We left for the hike soon after the successful purchase of every item from the list. P.S: None wants to play with Fire.

11:30 AM: The Baby (read: Fire’s niece), Fire and I reached the trailhead after having fought with traffic and found a parking spot (#theStruggleIsAlwaysReal). We started the ascent.

11:45 AM: The name of the trail had rung a bell before but I decided not to jog my memory. 20 minutes into the hike and we reached a bridge. Everything came rushing back to me. I had already 2 of my facebook display pictures clicked here in two different outfits with two different group of people. This was going to be a hattrick for me – 3 consecutive years to the same place with 3 different groups of people. Not cool. Should take this as a signal and try different hikes.

1:00 PM: Fire led the troupe as usual. Baby followed her and I was at the tail-end. The hike got busier as the day and hike progressed. Dogs of all sizes made a point to annoy me. I tried to distract myself by eavesdropping.

Two friends/colleagues, both probably in their late twenties, walked a few feet behind us. The conversation was about the risks they had taken in their lives and relationships. And then something one of them said caught my attention –

Friend 1: But then, I can’t even imagine how my life would have been had I stayed back and continued my job…you know…

Friend 2: Yeah, me too. And I think it is wrong to think like that. When you doubt your life choices and decisions you are in a way disrespecting yourself.

4:00 PM: We reached the trailhead, drank hot coffee and drove back to Seattle.

That sentence about doubting life choices ran in infinite loops in my brain. I had been doubting my decisions for a while now. Every time I saw the numbers on my credit card bills, salary account and student loan account I doubted my decision of coming to the US to pursue my dreams. Dreams are expensive. I could have avoided the debts and the hassles and tension. Every time my grandparents were sick and hospitalized I questioned my choice of leaving India. I wasn’t around when my grandfather passed away. I shall be forever guilty about that. Guaranteed, I would not have been in the position I am at had I not taken the risks. There is no way I could have achieved what I have had I not taken the risks. But still, I do try and imagine how my life would have been had I not taken the steps I did. Maybe life would have been better… or maybe not.

That made me realize… when I doubt my own decisions I am disrespecting myself. Whatever path you chose to walk on was your choice. Just because you had hiccups does not mean you made the wrong one. You gotta walk till you reach the destination. In the end… whatever the deal is… you gotta face the consequences and own up to it. Period.

#firstWorldProblems

7:50 AM: I turned the hot water knob. I turned the cold water knob. Could not get the water temperature as desired.

7:55 AM: The above steps had been repeated around 100 times by now. I was frustrated. I had a meeting at 9 AM and the shower wasn’t doing its job. I was going to be fashionably late to this one (as usual).

8:40 AM: I ran toward the train station. I was going to be late for the meeting but the only emotion I had was of ‘disappointment’ toward my ‘shower’. If only shower could feel.

7:00 PM: It was a regular IMO with my parents. 10 minutes into the call I found myself cribbing about my shower! 😐 My parents laughed out loud. I wondered why! It was a legit problem for me. It took me complete 5 minutes to adjust my shower every morning and that mattered to me. The equation goes like this —>

5 minutes in the morning > 50 minutes in the evening

But my parents LOLing at my “problem” (the world should be read with quotations) made me realize the intensity of my problem… which was none. It was as if I had made something up to crib about. Getting late for work because of not being able to adjust the shower… in the bathroom of my 1 bedroom apartment… at the heart Seattle downtown sounds like a problem people would love to have.

After a close assessment of all my “problems”, I realized that all of them were #firstWorldProblems. I started taking mental notes and came up with a list.

Shower temperature adjustment – In the bathroom of my 1 bedroom apartment that is located in the heart of Seattle downtown. 1 – You cannot get any more downtown than this. 2- I should be glad that I have running hot water/water all the time.
The more I think about this problem the more the picture of barren lands and people dying of drought comes to my mind. I come from a place in India where running water is a myth and all lands are barren; irrigation doesn’t exist and the only way farmers can be debt free is by committing suicide. When I think about that I think this might be the most first world problem I can ever have.
“I have no clothes to wear” – At least 4 piece of clothing falls on the ground when I open my wardrobe. I have an insane number of clothes and my wardrobe is always going to overflow unless I get rid of like half of it. I still cannot find clothes to wear.
This is one of the three essentials of life – Roti, Kapda aur Makaan. The problem of my life is that I have a too much of ‘kapda’ while people in other parts of the world cannot make their ends meet. I think I am probably blind to have been saying this.
Books – I like books. Books on the lines of clothes are overflowing too. My bookshelf is full and I need to find an overflowing section to keep my books. This is something I figured today.
All this while adult literacy rate in India is only 72.1% (Adult literacy rate for China: 96.4%. Please don’t blame India’s population here). Even Myanmar surpasses us by 21% (Myanmar at 93.1%) and the world average is 86.3%. The no. 1 reason they say is poverty. Too many books to read… probably a good problem to have.
Cannot get my makeup right – My makeup can be shiny/too shiny/perfect/bland/WTF is that? depending on the proportions of foundations and moisturizers I use. I cannot have the same look any two days.
So… I have enough money to buy multiple foundations and multiple moisturizers and cannot get the proportion of all of them perfect. And I crib about my makeup not being perfect… Yea… this is certainly as stupid as it can get.
My bathroom does not have a plug – So I cannot use all the hair curling/straightening/drying gadgets in my bathroom.
I crib about this while 2.5 billion people do not have access to a loo.
‘Alexa’ doesn’t listen – And Fire has come across this problem as well. Our little robot (maybe?!) does not listen to our orders if and when she is playing loud music for us. Our voices don’t cut through the music probably. This is too fancy to even be considered as a first world problem.

After reading the list of my first world problems I thank God/whoever made me so privileged/my parents for granting me everything I ever wanted/did not want/never thought I would have. I have no wish list anymore. Do you? I think it is time we stop thinking about our fictitious problems and do good to eliminate the real world problems from this world. Use your resources well. Do your bit.

Of Moh and Maya

Flashback: From a long time ago…

2:30 AM – It was a random morning. I had unexpectedly scored exceptionally well on a test that I thought I would have to take again. I had sneezed 20 times already and the day had not even started. Everything was weird about the situation – the place, my unexpected trip to Mumbai, the time, the weather (very cold; something that I never get to experience). I was abnormally laid back about my early morning flight. I hadn’t even packed yet. Today, I wanted life to take its course.

4:00 AM – We left for the airport. We were obviously running late. My family always takes the pain to drop me off at the airport and waits till I check in, be it any time of the day. Yes, I have been that lucky! Our ride to the airport was supposed to cover all the serious topics on the agenda for this trip. The family meeting began. Thoughts were aligned. Priorities were refined. We reached a consensus. Everything was resolved. Everyone was happy. It is unusual for your priorities to align with those of your parents. None of us compromise on anything. And it was never about ego. Ego does not really exist in my family (Touchwood).

The last month had been terrible for me personally. Life had forced me to take a series of desperate decisions. Desperate times desperate measures. I detested evenings. My parents were worried. My decisions were questioned. I stood alone. All I wanted was to realize my dreams. Every little disagreement killed me a little. I could not settle.

5:00 AM – I checked in and swiftly moved around the airport. Mumbai airport always feels like home. It is as if I belong there. My brain feels and thinks brilliantly every time I am at an airport. I should have taken all my exams at the airport. Who knows I would have aced every one of them! Mumbai airport is also shopping paradise for me. I checked in at Foursquare, tweeted on twitter and hopped on to the bus that led us the plane. Early morning flights are lovely (read: complimentary breakfast).

6:00 AM: I found my seat, and made a small talk to the Saudi based south Indian seated beside me. I was so engrossed in the movie that I did not realize the plane taking off. I did not realize the turbulence maybe because a- I had grown used to flights or b- the movie was awesome.

And it struck me…how much I was used to the pleasures of my life. Frequent flying, chauffeur driven cars, eating at the best restaurants in the city, staying at the best places, buying the most expensive things impulsively – and not thinking about anything while doing any of these and more. I realized how material-driven life was/is. But how long can a Gucci bag make us happy? Desire is real. Everyone wears brands, every kid wants the best of the toys, every girl wants a diamond, every man wants a Roland…the list is endless. Personally, I am drowned. And I see no signs of recovering.

8:30 AM – While I tried to define ‘simple living’ in my mind the pilot spoke in his supremely sensuous voice. I had never paid attention to announcements but his voice too compelling. We landed. The sunny weather awaited me. I politely left thanking the flight attendant and hoping that my luggage had traveled back with me.

I wonder if material pleasure equals happiness! It certainly means a lot though. The pleasure is way over-rated. I am not really sure why the world has turned materialistic- peer pressure maybe. Everyone believes in ‘If you’ve got it…Flaunt it!’. It is a vicious cycle. ‘Simple living and high thinking’ said someone zillion years ago. I wonder if it holds true in this world and age. I wonder if we can denounce the pleasures and live a really simple life. Probably not.

Wiser on the run…

June 6, 2015.

10:00 AM: It was a sunny Seattle morning and was going to be my last one in Seattle for a while. I was on my way Portland- 3 months at the Nike headquarters. I was excited. I boarded the train. It was going to be a scenic ride.

I noticed her while still struggling with my carry-on luggage. She was pretty and old; her eyes spoke volumes about her suffering; her body language screamed fear, yet her elegance stood out. I know I am no psychologist, but she was an easy read. She looked at me and said ‘Hi’ with a broad yet faded smile. We started talking.

We spoke at length about how we make decisions in life, our relationships (failed and current) and her marriage and mine. She lived the life I fantasized (for a vacation) and I lived hers. She lived in a shell, having an alcoholic for a husband. And I always lived in mine. She never had kids and asked me about mine. I said ‘sure’! I didn’t know why I said that. I quickly calculated her age and mine and realized she was old enough to be my mother!

I had been soul-searching recently and she answered some of my ‘should I? should I not?’ questions. She asked me to wait. We take a lot of decisions to achieve (emotional, physical, financial or mental) stability in life and parking decisions may not be an option in a lot of situations. But she asked me to wait. And I found that to be a better idea than jumping guns. The conversation made me ponder about all the pressing concerns of mine.

What if I decide to stay single all my life? What if I decide to live by myself all my life and not care about what the world had to say about it? What if I gave up the job I disliked? What if I give up on relationships that have been hurting me? What if I could just say no?

Every word of hers made me wiser. Her voice deepened as she spoke. She regretted her decisions in life and so did I. I am sure all of us have regrets. What is a life without regrets?

Time flew. We reached Portland. She was walking back into her unnerving life and her disappointment was evident. I was sad to let her go. We hoped our paths would cross again. It was a goodbye. How I wish I could keep her with me.

I felt privileged to have had such an impactful conversation with a stranger. It’s funny that we find answers at the most unexpected places. It’s almost as if every person you meet has a purpose. We actually learn something from every person in our life. Maybe ‘meant to be’ has more than one meaning. Maybe some paths are meant to be crossed and some journeys are meant to be taken. That’s how we grow.

Until next train ride…